Kickass Life List! (bucket list)

This is a list of everything i want to do in my life, and it's still growing! I'm not gonna wait around till i'm on my death bed and wish i had done something, i'm gonna go out there and chase the good things in life :)
Blue words are linkys!


1. Learn to say “I love you” in five different languages
2. Volunteer for a charity
3. Watch the sunrise and sunset in the same day
4. Write down 100 things that make me happy
5. Donate Blood
6. Hug a tree
7. Sing in public
8. Visit NYC
9. Dance in the rain
10. Pay for the person behind me at the drive thru
11. Leave an inspirational note for someone to find
12. Sing in front of a crowd
13. Say yes to everything for a day (within reason)
14. Go to Bonaroo
15. Get a tattoo
16. Run a 5k
17. Go to a hockey game
18. Be mute for a day
19. Volunteer at a soup kitchen
20. Write and record a song
21. Ride in a hot air balloon
22. Dance in an elevator
23. Bungee jump
24. Finish a 1000 piece puzzle
25. Go paragliding
26. Learn a poem by heart
27. Read the entire bible
28. Go on a mission trip
29. Go paintballing
30. Write letters to my future daughter
31. Send a secret to postsecret
32. Do a triathlon
33. See an IMAX film
34. Go stargazing
35. Write all bad memories on a piece of paper, burn this paper afterward
36. Make a friend from another country
37. Go on a road trip with a best friend
38. Keep a dream journal for a month
39. Go to a Renaissance Faire
40. Buy a Wreck This Journal and finish it
41. Send a postcard to a friend while on vacation
42. Go to a movie theater by myself
43. Participate in dance marathon
44. See 10 musicals/plays
45. Steal someone’s lawn gnome, take pictures of all the places we went together, return with pictures
46. Visit the Grand Canyon
47. See the Empire State Building
48. Make a mobile
49. Make a list of things that make me happy 
50. Audition to be an extra in a film
51. Finish a large blizzard at DQ
52. Attend the midnight premiere of a movie
53. Find out my blood type
54. Run 2 miles without stopping
55. Prayer journal every day for 2 months
56. Memorize 50 pictures on scripture
57. Call a friend once a week for a month
58. Give up pop for a year
59. Meet Julia Nunes
60. Try acupuncture
61. Learn how to backflip 
62. Milk a cow
63. Write a song
64. Go skydiving
65. Complete the 100 pushups challenge
66. Learn to make paper cranes
67. (I skipped this number! eep)
68. Make pasta from scratch 
69. Donate to locks of love
70. Register as an organ donor
71. Make a handmade gift for a friend
72. Go rock climbing – legit rock climbing
73. Visit Coney Island
74. Learn to play a full drum-set
75. Learn how to wall flip
76. Walk on my hands for 100 feet
77. Learn to kickflip
78. See 26 bands beginning with letters A-Z
79. Be published
80. Create a blog
81. -------------------
82. Learn how to knit
83. Create a piece of art and sell it
84. Dismember a chicken
85. Hold a tarantula
86. Visit every state in the U.S.
87. Ride on a zip line
88. Smoke a hookah
89. Completely finish a crossword puzzle
90. Have a meaningful conversation with a stranger
91. Write myself a letter to open in 1 year, 5 years, and 10 years
92. Go busking
93. Go to a book signing
94. Receive a fan letter
95. Eat fire
96. Wear colored contacts
97. Hold a monkey
98. See a 3-D movie
99. Have a useless, random collection
100. Play for tips in a coffee shops
101. Contact someone with your own name
102. Learn the element song
103. Go shopping cart jousting
104. Watch every episode of the office…EVER
105. Count from 1 to 1 million
106. Make 1000 paper cranes
107. Buy a turtle, name it Franklin
108. Get a watch tan
109. Learn how to snowboard
110. Be in a flash mob
111. Knit a hat
112. Do 10 things on “333 ways to get kicked out of Wal-Mart" list
113. Learn how to surf
114. Go to an oxygen bar
115. Sample every dish at a buffet
116. Have a lemonade stand
117. Break into a friends house and rearrange it
118. Ride a bull
119. Crowd surf
120. Longboard down a mountain 
121. Get a famous persons autograph
122. Try frog legs
123. Learn a song in a different language
124. Eat a conch fritter
125. Propose to a stranger at taco bell with a “Will you marry me?” hot sauce packet
126. Hug a stranger
127. Try jet skiing
128. Go zorbing
129. Pack a PBJ sandwich every day for a month
130. Complete 5 of my KLL goals in a day
131. Do the 26 things challenge
132. Go whale watching
133. Climb the half dome
134. Go to New Zealand and live there
135. Climb Mt. Plesant
136. Go couch surfing in a different state
137. Go base jumping
138. Go base jumping in a wing-suit
139. Go hang gliding
140. Bike/unicycle the Colorado trail
141. Hot air balloon bungee jump
142. Plant a tree
143. Enter art in an art exhibit 
144. Coin a word
145. Bowl a 200+
146. Sleep on top of a roof
147. Eat shark
148. Take DJ lessons
149. Go suspended capsule biking
150. Travel to India
151. Do the polar Dip in the Maumee River

Wait, what do i do?! Ahhhhhh!

So i haven't written in over a month, life has just been weird. I don't know if anyone even reads this thing, but it's a good place to write i guess.

So lately i have just really been struggling with trying to figure out God's will. I know that is never an easy thing to do, but i just don't understand. I'm just feeling like He doesn't want me to do anything i want to do lately. Like i will pray over something for a while and really be asking God to help me out and then everything goes the complete opposite of the way i think it will.

Like i tried out for musical again this, hoping for a bigger part, and the day before i lost my voice completely. I auditioned while being sick, and basically i sucked. So i got chorus again (an extra pretty much) and now i am not so sure that i want to do it. Not because i am a bad sport and i am upset about the part i got, but because i could spend my time more productively by getting a job or something. Is that what God wants? Is that why i was sick when i auditioned?

Then today, i did something which i have been looking forward to for months. It was our schools blood drive. So i was really excited, and i had been getting lots of iron, eating healthily, and drinking a ton of water. And i mean A TON. So i get there for my time slot and it was running behind, so i sat there for about three hours waiting, getting more and more excited. Then i finally get in my chair and they get the needle out and get ready to put it in my vein. But where was my vain? Apparently it was too small, and they needed to do a vein check. But no one wanted to do it, so they let me go. I asked them to at least try and they said no.

I mean i am sure i'll have my chance again, but why couldn't i do this? I know i had nothing to do with it, but it still hits me as a personal failure. All of it. The musical, the blood drive, everything.

I'm at a point where i have absolutely no idea what God wants me to do. Was i wanting to do these things with the wrong motives? Maybe my desires aren't matching up with God's.

Ugh.